I haven’t written this as punctually as I would have liked. Partly, because I’ve been too busy celebrating, and also because I was waiting for the vast wisdom of middle age to enlighten me. In truth, I have never had a better birthday. Matthew came back and whisked me and Sophie away to St. Malo where we were completely spoiled at the Thermes Marins Hotel. I have never stayed at such a beautiful hotel and the room Matthew picked had a balcony directly across from the beach. I will do a post on the hotel later but for now I’d like to focus on the newfound wisdom or lack there of.

I have been thinking about this approaching birthday for a while. It’s a significant one and it’s not all at the same time. For me, fifty was a big mark on the road map of life. I was determined to make it a momentous year. I wanted to feel fulfillment that I had been lacking and I, like most at this age, felt the time is nigh. Really no tomorrows are promised, and 50 is well past middle age for someone with my gene pool.

It was my dream to celebrate this birthday on foreign soil and I did. It was my hope that I would be healthy, happy and hopeful as I entered this next decade. I am. It seems I am having a lot of the feelings that I expect an eighteen-year-old has when journeying off to college for the first time, or when one first moves away from family, home and the familiar. I didn’t really do that at 18, or 21, 30 or 40. I always stayed close. It turned out that 50 was the age where I really reached out into the unknown and made the jump.

Now I feel the excitement and newness of each day. I think I have a bit more wisdom than my eighteen-year-old self would have had and can navigate this journey with a bit more confidence. Truthfully, I have nothing to lose. I have made a beautiful family and set my children up for happy, independent, futures. I have the best husband in the world and a relationship that continues to grow and expand. I have wonderful friends on two continents who make my life rich. I have Sophie for Christ’s sake.

This is the time in my life where I hope I can give and feel and appreciate. I want to see different cultures, learn new things, taste new flavors and try to leave a positive mark in my wake. I feel gratitude. I hope I can continue this celebration for quite a while. Who knows what I might found around the next corner?