I’m reluctantly coming off a weekend with some very special people. My cousin Anne and her daughter came to Maine for a weekend packed with good food, laughter, ocean, shopping and lots of wine. Perhaps a glass or two too much wine.

Anne is the sister God didn’t give me and we are so similar that we think often with one brain. We laugh until we cry and I can be completely me in all my glory. She loves me unconditionally and the feeling is mutual. We took the girls shopping in Freeport, walked the dogs, spent a few hours at Goose Rocks and made some wonderful memories.

Hanging over us this weekend was the realization that just around the corner big changes were coming. Lily becomes increasingly aware that college is on the horizon and she has to say goodbye to her besties and her town in the next few weeks. She is emotional and so am I.

I am about to embark on a journey that will take me far from family and friends and it will change things. I won’t be able to jump in a car and drive to my brother’s or cousin’s house for a surprise visit. I won’t even be in the same time zone. Things are changing and honestly everyone is a bit uneasy. I am still excited but I am starting to have the urge to leave sooner rather than later and avoid goodbyes. The slow band aid rip is extremely painful.

I have always struggled with goodbyes. Even on the phone, I often hang up before the person I’m speaking with is ready or feels they have properly closed the conversation. My mother used to get so mad at me for this that she would call me back immediately and tell me that she was going to say goodbye again so she could feel more satisfied and then I didn’t dare hang up until she told me to.

I choked on my goodbye to my sweet cousin. I told her that I would see her one more time before I leave. That doesn’t really make any sense at all since I’m running out of time, have to return my leased car, and will most likely just be postponing the inevitable horror which will leave us both in tears.

Anyhow, I had a marvelous weekend. The girls get along so well and I feel like we have created some beautiful memories. We all went out to the Dolphin for a delicious dinner. The food was great, the light was magical and we took a million pictures. Matthew and I got married out there and we see it as such a special place. Long live the chowder!

So here we are. Three-ish weeks left. Lots to do. More goodbyes. Buckle up, this is going to be a rocky ride.