For those unfamiliar, Avignon is far to the south of Paris. It is a good 3 hour train ride to Provence. Once I reconciled that I was going there and not being rescued, I began to make plans to return to Paris and creep back to Laval. The boys were helping from their end. The looked up tickets and times and suggested a plan. I was able to buy the last ticket on a train that would take me from Avignon to Paris mid afternoon. The only ticket available was first class. Awesome. Once I arrived at Gare Lyon in Paris, I would take an Uber to Montparnasse and catch a train that would bring me to Laval for 6:55. I would conceivably be in my house by 8:00pm.

I had a couple of hours to kill at the Gare Avignon TGV. There was no luggage storage so I wheeled all this shit around and got Sophie leashed up. I took her outside to grass where she ate and sniffed and did her business. After, we went back into the station to find a sandwich for me and so I could pay to use the toilet. We went back and forth into the station 5-10 times for the next two hours. Sophie was relaxed and I was sweating my ass off in my handy all black travel outfit.

I got to the platform early, double checked the train number and again boarded a train. This time however it was the right train, headed north to Paris. I wrestled my oversized luggage into two different locations and found my actual seat. Once there, I communicated with Matthew and Dave and Matt about my new anticipated arrival time in Laval and overall shit experience.

There was a young family with twin one year-olds across the aisle from me. I remember thinking they wre beautiful. I immediately closed my eyes and tried to sleep. The babies transitioned from being pleasantly vocal to full on scream/crying and maintained that for a full hour. The TRAIN STOPPED. IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE. They announced there was a maintenance issue and the train would be delayed INDEFINITELY. The babies roared. and I began to weep.

Eventually I realized that I was going to be so delayed that I would not make my connection from Montparnasse to Laval. I started to really lose my shit. Matthew suggested that I just stay in Paris for the night and try to find a train early the next morning. I called the boys and updated them. I looked for a train for the next day and they were all sold out save two tickets on one early train. I booked it. I begged the boys to come pick me up now on Saturday and they agreed. Matthew booked a room. The train started moving and the babies fell asleep

But not for long. The train stopped. AGAIN An announcement was made that there would be further delays. First one baby woke and started to cry followed shortly after by his brother. It started pissing rain. The train lurched forward. Sophie lloked at me with utter horror and bewilderment. It would be a miracle if we actually survived this perversion of a train journey.